Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Networking is like fishing. Just give some beer and a boat and I’ll be in business."

"Better than learning how to speak a foreign language, is to start speaking the truth. But few people will listen, because they just don’t understand."

"I love Huey Lewis, but not the News, because the News is too depressing."

"When you give everything and expect nothing in return, only then will you be in a position to gain anything. When you love loving, you give because giving is getting. Giving is a gift unto itself, and when you realize this you understand that you can’t network if you can’t love."

"Money is not equal for all people. A strong personal brand adds more lift and leverage. One dollar from me may buy a soda from a car dealership, but one dollar from Justin Bieber may get him a Ferrari. And they'd pay him to drive away."

"01210 is a pyramid, & worms move like handicapped snakes. My dream belongs in a wheelchair, because I just spilled coffee all over my sleep."

"Eat, fast, and then eat fast. It’s a diet for both the body and the soul."

"White letters plus white paper equals invisibility. Just because you can’t see my love for you, doesn’t mean I didn’t write about it."

"A raisin on the ground is full of hope that if it just keeps aging, it will turn into wine and get drunk on its wrinkly self."

"Love flows like flowers, and grows like water. I’m so thirsty for romance I could drink a dozen roses."

"If you want me, you’d better hurry. Act now, supplies are limited."

"He rose like heroes, and I rose like rows of red roses. Love grows wherever you plant it, so I try to farm it wherever I go."

"The strands of DNA are like strings, and it’s as if I am a walking guitar, a musical being whose vibration can be heard as love."

"She plants love, and she grows roses. The fragrance of romance comes from the blossom that blooms in the heart."

"The wind is my favorite color. It reminds me of the love she painted on my life as she blew past me."

"A follow-up letter is best when not written on the back of a suicide note. Remember this next time you’re at a networking event, unless your new connection is a mortician."

"I just bought a bag of poetry, but it was mostly air. The author must have learned from the potato chip industry."

"I breathe onto a mirror just to make sure I’m still alive, and to see how good looking my breath is."

"When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust. When I saw you with my clone in a dream, I saw the future."

"Unreturned love is like trying to make a sandwich with one slice of bread. Don’t stress—fold it in half and love yourself."