#humor

"NO PDA,school rules. And besides she's my partner dickhead."said Alex."

"I’d fight for your love like I’m Tyler Durden. I want you to hit on me as hard as you can."

"Heaven [10w] Heaven’s not a destination ~it’s a way of processing life."

"Jew in a Canoe Haiku Jew in a canoe,whitewater rushes, the canoe tips.The Jew doesn't."

"Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one."

"Rabbit's clever,"said Pooh thoughtfully."Yes,"said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever.""And he has Brain.""Yes,"said Piglet, "Rabbit has Brain."There was a long silence."I suppose,"said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything."

"Coins [10w] Statesmen whose faces are on coins are amenable to change."

"Dance in the rain, follow the path of lovely lanes, you are what you always wanted to be, so chill out, dear friend!"

"The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom."

"Jace suggested that the cast of "Gilligan's Island"could go do something anatomically unlikely with themselves."

"The problem with our society is that our values aren’t in the right place. There’s an awful lot of bleeding and naked bodies on prime-time networks, but not nearly enough cable television on public programming."

"To be the best, you have to be willing to do what nobody does. And today, if nobody reads and nobody works hard, then you also have to give up reading and become lethargic to be successful."

"What Children See [10w] "A spider is an octopus who lives in the desert."

"Love is you wearing her favorite shirt of yours, just like you did yesterday and the day before. And the day before that too."

"Arianne had her feet up on the table, wearing a striped conductor's cap.Arriane was fixated on the game. A chocolate cigar bobbed between her lips as she contemplated her next move. Roland was giving Arianne the hawk eye."Checkmate, bitch,"Arianne said triumphantly, knocking over Roland's king."

"There is until there isn’t. That’s just the way it is. Until it isn’t."

"No, I do my torturing in the dungeon like any other respectable castle owner,"

"I want to make something of myself. I believe it’s called a statue."

"I had a dream about you. You were storing my brain in a pickle jar in the fridge, and I only discovered it when I went to garnish my hamburger. Mindless and hungry, I was a US politician’s ideal voter."

"Is there anything more pathetic than a flower that doesn’t get enough sunlight and dies, because it couldn’t get out of bed until four in the afternoon?"