#humor

"Look at me!Look at me!Look at me NOW!It is fun to have funBut you have to know how."

"How're we getting to King's Cross tomorrow, Dad?"asked Fred as they dug into a sumptuous pudding."The Ministry's providing a couple of cars,"said Mr. Weasley.Everyone looked up at him."Why?"said Percy curiously."It's because of you, Perce,"said George seriously. "And there'll be little flags on the hoods, with HB on them-""-for Humongous Bighead,"said Fred."

"FABLEHAVEN: None who enter will leave unchanged. Trespassers will be turned to stone."

"The Cure [10w] Laughter, love and faith can cure 95% of all illnesses."

"Death: "THERE ARE BETTER THINGS IN THE WORLD THAN ALCOHOL, ALBERT."Albert: "Oh, yes, sir. But alcohol sort of compensates for not getting them."

"You can knock on a deaf man's door forever."

"The children now love luxury. They have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise."

"Why did he have to be so gorgeous? Why did he have to stand so close, and why did I still love him so much?"

"Oh! to shoot for the stars if feels right. Aim for my heart if it feels right."

"Think, think, think."

"The first time you see something that you have never seen before, you almost always know right away if you should eat it or run away from it."

"Either get out of bed or else take your clothes off,"he said. "I'm not in the mood to compromise."

"No matter how much water a sink takes on, it never lives up to its name. The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink."

"I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early."

"Err "To err is human ~ more wine!"

"2 Rules on Becoming a Good Poet [10w] Rule#1: Never write shitty poetry.Rule#2: Never forget Rule #1."

"If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate."

"Start here & go until you die, he said. What's so complicated about that?"

"Older doesn't necessarily mean wiser. Some trees live to be hundreds of years old, and what the fuck do they know?"

"Today I Learned: Delete Today I learnedwhen you delete stuff on your computerit still resides on your hard drive.It's sort of like getting divorcedbut that bitch still lives in your house."